112 http://media.bonnint.net/dado/oss-trav/0/2/255.jpg ToastedRav.com: TV & Movies Sat, 21 Nov 2009 21:31:28 -0700 ToastedRav Staff mike@toastedrav.com <![CDATA[America's Next Top Model Will be Shorter the Next Time Around]]> 7282 Wed, 04 Mar 2009 11:17:14 -0700
It's hard to believe that Tyra Banks has been searching for America's Next Top Model for 12 different cycles already. By now, she's perfected the overdramatic, over-exaggerated, incredibly sloooow way of talking with the popular show's contestants, and although some past winners are more successful than others, the show must go on. Well, it's back, and ANTM junkies everywhere are looking forward to tuning in to Cycle 12 tonight at 7 p.m. on The CW.

If you like what you see tonight, or even if you have modeling aspirations that have nothing to do with Miss Banks, you will soon have an opportunity to get your stiletto-clad foot in the door. This Saturday, ANTM is calling all wannabe models in St. Louis. They're casting hopefuls for Cycle 13, but there's a catch this time around; you have to be "short." In all actuality, 5'7" isn't considered that short in the real world, so since that's the tallest you can be to make the cut for the casting call here this weekend, the next season of ANTM promises to be a bit more average.

Date: Saturday, March 7
Time: 8 a.m.
Where: St. Louis College of Health Careers

Missourians have made it onto the show before (Booneville's Sarah Rhoades was on Cycle 5), so good luck to any ladies headed to the casting call.

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<![CDATA[Prep Yourself for America's Most Tone-Deaf Idols]]> 5936 Mon, 12 Jan 2009 04:00:00 -0700
I'm not really a fan of the American Idol. Sure, it's fun to yell "Ahhhh, Kelly Clarkson" from time to time, and I really appreciate the music of Carrie Underwood, but other than that, I think the show is overrated and the judges are annoying (and possibly incoherent anyway).

That being said, I'm still looking forward to the start of the eighth season of the show this Tuesday (January 13). It's not because I can't wait to see which 12-year-old's closet Paula has raided this time; it's because I love to watch the singers who suck. It all starts out with a well-intentioned mom telling their child that they have a great voice, and the next thing you know, they're embarrassing themselves on national TV because they think they they's the next Stevie Wonder. But it's not just one tone-deaf idol wannabe - the supply is seemingly endless, which is why I'm so excited to see who thought they could sing this time around.

To get you in the mood for the start of this season, click on [tab:video] for a few of my favorite horrible idol auditions ever.

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<![CDATA[St. Louis Is Ga-Ga Over Clooney Film]]> 5849 Wed, 07 Jan 2009 08:48:08 -0700 I doubt you've heard, but George Clooney is coming to Saint Louis to shoot a movie. To know that, you'd need to own a television or radio, read a newspaper, or talk to anyone within a 100 mile radius of this town. The Jason Reitman-directed Up In The Air is starting to set up shop in our fair town and, though it's not every day an ER star visits the Gateway City, you'd think it was the second coming of Christ. "This town has gone ga-ga over this project." says Gary Hansen of IATSE Local 493, the studio mechanics union that'll provide crew members for the film. "They haven't even set up a production office yet and already I've gotten dozens of calls about people wanting to be extras, we've supposedly had George Clooney sightings, it's nuts." Though Hansen fears St. Louis' overzealous reaction to the news may perpetuate our stereotype as a cowtown, he admits, with advertising and commercial production work down sharply, the big budget project comes at just the right time. "Our members go from project to project, we live off commercials. Something like this allows us to work and have healthcare for the year."

Director Jason Reitman considers buying an electric razor with his massive tax credit

As much as St. Louisans would like to believe our town's charm and visual appeal caused Hollywood to come knocking, the almighty dollar played a larger role than any. Knowing the massive economic impact such a project brings with it, state officials dangled the tax credit carrot in front of producers just in time to sway them in our direction. Missouri currently boasts the highest tax credit available in the United States, offering up to $1.5 million to studios willing to set up shop. Though some estimate Up In The Air could bring St. Louis as much as $50 million, Hansen has a more conservative estimate of $30 million and says tax incentives could be a double-edged sword. "The film business is fickle, they'll go wherever they get a good tax credit." says Hansen, "It's a fine line to walk though, because we don't want to just give our town away." Be that as it may, there's likely no stopping the hype train as Mr. Clooney and the rest of the crew inches closer and closer to the film's mid-February start date. In the meantime, those wanting to be extras should keep an eye on the Missouri Film Commission's project hotline. Until then, the wait continues.  

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<![CDATA[Forget Santa Claus...George Clooney Is Coming To Town]]> 5632 Tue, 23 Dec 2008 13:17:35 -0700 You know about the “list”, right?  It’s a list that married people keep detailing which celebrities they’re allowed to “stray” with should the opportunity ever present itself.  I feel sorry for all the men in town who have wives or girlfriends that put George Clooney on their “list”.  How many men laughed when their wife and/or girlfriend put Clooney on the list thinking, “Yeah, like you’ll ever have a chance to meet him?”

Well boys, the jokes on you.  Why?  Because according to AP, George Clooney is coming to town.  And not just for a quick drop-in like Will Smith did last month.  He’ll be in town for months to film the movie Up In The Air.  Lock up your wives (and daughters) St. Louis. 

He’ll be playing a coldhearted corporate downsizer on a quest to reach 1,000,000 frequent flier miles.  The film is directed by Jason Riteman, the man who brought us Juno.  Apparently a large chunk of the movie will be filmed in the recently closed Class D section of Lambert Airport.  That’s the third movie that’s been filmed at Lambert since they lost TWA.  Apparently there’s an upside to recession.  Who knew?  Of course, if Hollywood is looking for airports with light traffic, wait until the get a load of Mid America Airport.

The St. Louis Film Board estimates that the movie could have an economic impact of $50 million on the region.  (I’m assuming/hoping they mean $50 million to the good but you never know.  St. Louis can get pretty dumb when somebody famous shows up.)  I wonder how much of the $50 million will go to Cordell & Cordell after Clooney tears his way through this town’s women?  Of course, Clooney’s so cool most men would probably be honored if he slept with their wives.  It’s like getting the “Cool Guy Seal Of Approval” on your taste in ladies.

The film is listed on IMDB.com but it’s so new nobody’s even posted how much it will suck yet (which I thought was sort of an IMDB tradition.)  So our fare city will be treated to 5-months (or more) of George Clooney sightings.  One positive (but unintended) consequence of his visit is that it could result in a series decline in the number of McGraw Millhaven mentions in Deb Peterson’s column.  Imagine what would happen if McGraw Millhaven actually meets George Clooney?  Deb Peterson’s head might explode.

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<![CDATA[Marley And Me: Cheesy, But That's The Point]]> 5595 Tue, 23 Dec 2008 12:25:06 -0700 Hollywood's adaptation of the insanely popular John Grogan novel Marley and Me joins the list of family-friendly films hoping to capitalize on the post-holiday movie rush. I'm usually not one of those "The book was much better." guys, but...the book was much better. That said, the novel topped the New York Times' Best Seller list for an extended run and remains one of the decade's most popular books, so the movie could be not as good and still be halfway decent, which is actually the case.

World's most adorable vacuum cleaner

Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston headline the flick with support coming from Eric Dane, Alan Arkin, and of course, a Humane Society's worth of pooches. The story (if you're one of the few who hasn't cracked the book,) is a predictable but smile-inducing tale of a clumsy (Grogan dubbed him "The World's Worst Dog") lab retriever who brings a young couple together by tearing everything in the house apart. If it sounds cheesy, it is...but let's not pretend we're expecting an Oscar winner here, you know the plot coming into the theater. Now that we've accepted the cheese factor, we're left with performance and dialogue.

Doesn't this just make you want a dog?

Wilson and Aniston turn in respectable performances as John and Jennifer Grogan, a young couple trying to juggle journalism careers and a growing brood. Jen's in her niche with the fluffy role, so it's believable to the audience to see her getting yanked along the beach by a giant mutt, spilling a bag of dog food, and so on. With his latest paychecks coming from Wedding Crashers and You, Me, and Dupree, Wilson also seems at home with a light comedy. Though director David Frankel (The Devil Wears Prada) takes a few liberties with the novel's adaptation, he stays true to the story's critical events, but uses more than his fair share of horribly cheesy lines that my stomach wishes were left out of the story. As for the human portion of the Grogan clan, let's just say these kids should stay in school. Though I realize a young actor's role rarely defines a career, the handful that played Patrick, Conor, and Colleen make their scenes feel like an elementary school play. That, combined with the fact that the lines the kids delivered were considerably over their heads, made a distinguishing smudge on an otherwise likeable movie.

If you're a dog person, your appreciation for Marley and Me will grow tenfold. The giant pooch's antics are not only smirk-worthy, they're downright accurate as anyone with an oversized mutt will tell you. If you don't swing on the K9 side of the vine, either take the kids or wait for it to come out on DVD. Click [tab:video] for the trailer. This one gets a C+.

 

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<![CDATA[New Manly Trend: How to Sissify Yourself on TV]]> 5480 Mon, 15 Dec 2008 13:25:32 -0700
Despite my disdain for most reality TV shows, I'm not ashamed to admit that there are a few of them that regularly capture my attention. I'm all too guilty of tuning in to "The Hills," "The Deadliest Catch" and "The Real Housewives of Orange County" on multiple occasions.

However, I am extremely confident when I say that I will NOT be even remotely tempted to spend my limited free time watching annoyingly sissy "men" display their annoying sissyness, which seems to be the latest reality TV trend.

That's right, beginning tomorrow night at 9 p.m., you can tune in to "Momma's Boys" on NBC. (If you thought you heard me trying not to hurl just now, you heard right.) Just in case you can't tell what the show is about from its title, "Momma's Boys" will capture the "intense, emotional showdowns" among three young men who hold their mothers up as the most important lady in their lives. All the while, they will be searching for whoever their moms tell them to pick love.

And if you can't get your fill of watching idiot guys on "Mamma's Boys," you're in luck. Brody Jenner, former homeboy of the biggest loser on earth (Spender Pratt), has an opening in his dude posse. On December 29, "Bromance" debuts on MTV, and in the words of Mr. Jenner himself, becoming the go-to guy that he most wants to bond with won't be easy. Nine guys are going to try really hard though. For a preview of this cool cat's search for a new homeboy, click on [tab:video].

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<![CDATA[St. Louis Film Critics' Association Announces Awards Winners]]> 5481 Mon, 15 Dec 2008 12:45:58 -0700  

 

The St. Louis Film Critics' Association announced the 2008 awards winners.  You can see a list of the nominees in my posting from last week.  

Here's a complete list of who won what.  Feel free to discuss below.  

 

 

 

BEST PICTURE

The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button

 

BEST ACTOR

Sean Penn (Milk)

 

BEST ACTRESS

Kate Winslet (Revolutionary Road)

 

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight)

 

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

Viola Davis (Doubt)

 

BEST DIRECTOR

Danny Boyle (Slumdog Millionaire)

 

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM

Slumdog Millionaire - U.K./U.S.A/India

 

BEST DOCUMENTARY

Man On Wire

 

BEST COMEDY

Burn After Reading

 

BEST ANIMATED FILM

Wall-E

 

MOST ORIGINAL, INNOVATIVE OR CREATIVE FILM

The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button

 

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY

Mandy Walker (Australia)

 

BEST SCREENPLAY (ORIGINAL OR ADAPTED)

Peter Morgan (Frost/Nixon)

 

BEST MUSIC (SOUNDTRACK OR SCORE, ORIGINAL OR ADAPTED)

The Visitor

 

BEST SPECIAL EFFECTS

The Dark Knight

 

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<![CDATA[Slumdog Millionaire - A Must See]]> 5071 Fri, 12 Dec 2008 09:00:00 -0700 Anyone that’s ever participated in a trivia night knows that sometimes you find the answers in the oddest places.  I once correctly answered a question about Gunga Din, not because I’m a Rudyard Kipling aficionado but because I saw an adaptation of the poem on an episode of The Famous Adventures Of Mr. Magoo.   Slumdog Millionaire takes this conceit to new heights.  Directed by Danny Boyle (Trainspotting, 28 Days Later) Slumdog Millionaire takes place in India and tells the story of Jamal Malik (Dev Patel) and his brother Salim (Madhur Mittal).  Jamal and Salim, orphaned at an early age, are referred to colloquially as “slumdogs,” a derogatory term for uneducated street urchins that eke out a meager existence through varying combinations of begging, conning tourists and outright theft. 

As the movie opens, Jamal is on the Hindi version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.  He is one question away from winning the grand prize when the show runs of time and he is asked to come back the following evening.  (That’s not a spoiler by the way.  It’s literally the first thing they tell you.)  Suspected of cheating, he is abducted/arrested by the police and roughed up.  He’s then forced to go through his entire Millionaire run question-by-question explaining just exactly how he knew the answer to each question.  As he progresses through each round, we learn more about his life growing up on the streets of Mumbai.  Seemingly innocuous events provide answers later in life: a childhood song learned in school, a piece of foreign currency given to a friend, the name of an American inventor and on and on.  Jamal is the Kaiser Soze of quiz shows. 

Sometimes the answers are buried in the most painful of memories.  Living on the street at when they were both younger than ten, Jamal and Salim are taken in by Maman.  Maman is a sort of Indian Fagin, taking in abandoned children and teaching them the ins and outs of begging.  However, Maman is a much darker figure than Dickens’ Fagin (no mean feat).  Jamal’s motivation for competing on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire is that his childhood love Latika (Freida Pinto), whom he’s lost track of, watches the show religiously.  His interest is not to win the money (well, ok, maybe a little bit).  But his primary concern is to find his love. 

A large portion of the story’s flashback is told with child actors all which perfectly embody their respective characters.  The movie bounces back and forth quite a bit but Boyle’s direction is never rudderless.  You always know who you’re seeing and what’s going on.  Slumdog Millionaire is mash-up of the highest degree: part love story, party urban street drama, part Dickensian fairy tale, part travelogue of India’s seedy underbelly.  The film is a joyous rollercoaster ride of emotion.  It’s a crowd-pleaser of the highest order; an ebullient, exuberant ode to life and perseverance.  Boyle’s gritty depiction of urban squalor is told with dramatic camera angles and fast-paced editing that somehow perfectly fuses with this enchanted fable without undermining the sentimental (but not overly so) romance that is ultimately the movie’s heart.  Boyle somehow manages to create a story like no other yet simultaneously as old as time. 

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being Great Expectations and 1 being Get Rich Or Die Tryin’, Slumdog Millionaire gets a 9.

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<![CDATA[St. Louis Film Critics Association Announces Award Nominees]]> 5325 Mon, 08 Dec 2008 09:25:02 -0700  

The St. Louis Film Critics Association (of which I am a member) announced their fourth annual award nominees today.  In order for a film to be eligible, it has to have been shown in a St. Louis theater or film festival or  a screener DVD must have been made available to critics.  So you might see some titles on there that haven’t been released yet.  Don’t worry, it’s not rigged.  We’ve seen them (or at least been given ample opportunity). 

Here’s what’s been nominated:

 

 

BEST PICTURE

  • The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
  • The Dark Knight
  • Milk
  • Slumdog Millionaire
  • Frost/Nixon
  • Wall E

BEST ACTOR

  • Leonardo DiCaprio (Revolutionary Road)
  • Richard Jenkins (The Visitor) 
  • Frank Langella (Frost/Nixon)
  • Sean Penn (Milk)
  • Mickey Rourke (The Wrestler)

BEST ACTRESS

  • Cate Blanchett (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)
  • Anne Hathaway (Rachel Getting Married)
  • Angelina Jolie (Changeling)
  • Kate Winslet (The Reader)
  • Kate Winslet (Revolutionary Road)

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

  • Josh Brolin (Milk)
  • Robert Downey Jr. (Tropic Thunder)
  • Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight)
  • John Malkovich (Burn After Reading)
  • Michael Shannon (Revolutionary Road)
  • Jeffrey Wright (Cadillac Records)

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

  • Amy Adams (Doubt)
  • Penelope Cruz (Vicky Cristina Barcelona)
  • Viola Davis (Doubt)
  • Taraji P. Henson (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)
  • Frances McDormand (Burn After Reading)

BEST DIRECTOR

  • Danny Boyle (Slumdog Millionaire)
  • David Fincher (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)
  • Ron Howard (Frost/Nixon)
  • Christopher Nolan (The Dark Knight)
  • Gus Van Sant (Milk)

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM

  • The Class (Entre Les Murs) - France
  • I've Loved You So Long (Il Y A Longtemps Que Je T'aime) - France/Germany
  • Let The Right One In (Lat Den Ratte Komma In) - Swedish
  • Slumdog Millionaire - U.K./U.S.A/India
  • Tell No One (Ne Le Dis A Personne) - France

BEST DOCUMENTARY

  • Body Of War
  • Man On Wire
  • Pray The Devil Back To Hell
  • Shine A Light
  • Standard Operating Procedure

BEST COMEDY

  • Burn After Reading
  • Forgetting Sarah Marshall
  • Role Models
  • Tropic Thunder
  • Zack and Miri Make A Porno

BEST ANIMATED FILM

  • Bolt
  • Chicago 10
  • Kung Fu Panda
  • Madagascar II
  • Wall E
  • Waltz With Bashir

MOST ORIGINAL, INNOVATIVE OR CREATIVE FILM

  • The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
  • Slumdog Millionaire
  • Speed Racer
  • Synecdoche, N.Y.
  • Wall E
  • Waltz With Bashir

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY

  • Roger Deakins (Revolutionary Road)
  • Anthony Dod Mantle (Slumdog Millionaire)
  • Claudio Miranda (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)
  • Wally Pfister (The Dark Knight)
  • Harris Savides (Milk)
  • Mandy Walker (Australia)

BEST SCREENPLAY (ORIGINAL OR ADAPTED)

  • Simon Beaufoy and Vikas Swarup (Slumdog Millionaire)
  • Dustin Lance Black (Milk)
  • Peter Morgan (Frost/Nixon)
  • Eric Roth and Robin Swicord (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)
  • Nick Schenk and Dave Johannson (Gran Torino)

BEST MUSIC (SOUNDTRACK OR SCORE, ORIGINAL OR ADAPTED)

  • Cadillac Records
  • The Dark Knight
  • Gran Torino
  • The Visitor
  • Wall E

BEST SPECIAL EFFECTS

  • The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
  • The Dark Knight
  • Iron Man
  • Speed Racer
  • Wall E

Critics are only allowed to vote if they’ve seen every film in a specific category.  Noticeably absent is the upcoming Tom Cruise film Valkyrie.  It was not screened in time for nominations.  It was not screened for critics and MGM requested that it not be considered for any awards.  I’ll let you draw your own conclusions.

The winners will be announced Sunday, December 14.  For more info you can go to www.stlfilmcritics.org.  

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<![CDATA[Punisher: War Zone - Third Time's A Charm?]]> 5269 Fri, 05 Dec 2008 09:00:00 -0700 I’m a Punisher fan. I’m a comic book nerd.  I read comic books.  I collect comic books.  I have every issue of The Punisher.  I even own a copy of his first appearance in Amazing Spiderman #129.  I don’t say this to brag (if it can even be called “bragging”).  I say it in the spirit of full disclosure in order to give you insight as to how I might take in a movie of this nature.  I’m not put off by the over-the-top violence.  I recognize the fact that The Punisher is as much a parody of violence as it is a glorification of it.  It’s a revenge fantasy writ large.  I totally get it and am completely on board with the concept.  So let me get straight to the point:
Yuck.

What a dreary, dreadfully insipid movie.  Punisher: War Zone is without a doubt the worst movie I’ve reviewed so far.  I see movies for free and I still wanted my money back.  Nothing in this film works.  The acting, the staging, the set design, the story…nothing.  It’s an ugly, vile, mean-spirited film.

The story is virtually non-existent.  Frank Castle (aka The Punisher) is waging a one man war against crime after his family was caught in the crossfire of a mob shootout.  This time out The Punisher is played by Ray Stevenson.  This is the 3rd attempt to make this franchise work.  (And, just for the record, this is not a sequel to 2004’s The Punisher.)  The film opens with Castle killing virtually all of the heads of New York’s various crime “families.”  In the process he leaves one alive but severely wounded.  His name is Billy Russoti (played by Dominic West).  His face is mangled and reconstructed (poorly) by a back-alley plastic surgeon.  So he takes the name Jigsaw.  Why?  Because that’s what people do in these things.  In the realm of comic books, taking a name of this sort makes sense.  It’s part of the genre.  But cinematically, The Punisher doesn’t share a world with Spiderman and Captain America.  So it seems rather silly for a random mob boss to suddenly adopt a villainous nom de plume. 

After being released from back alley post-op, Jigsaw frees his even crazier brother, a cannibal that goes by the name of Looney Bin Jim (played by Doug Hutchison).  From there, Jigsaw’s mob goes on a killing spree to recover money and draw out The Punisher.

Castle has been reduced to a virtually silent, vigilante golem.  He doesn’t speak until almost a half-hour into the film.  It’s one of the movie’s highlights.  There is hardly a single performance that works.  Dominic West as Jigsaw would be more at home in a Damon Runyon story.  If not for the hyper-violence, his performance would be perfectly at home in Batman…the TV show.  Doug Hutchison’s fey interpretation of Looney Bin Jim feels like he stepped out of some sort of community theater production of Silence Of The Lambs.  And Dash Mihok’s rendition of Detective Soap, a weak-kneed officer assigned the task of arresting The Punisher, seems to have been designed for some sort of Saturday morning cartoon version called Punisher Adventures that would air between Dragonball Z and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.  It’s as if every major character each thought they were making a completely different movie.  As for Ray Stevenson as The Punisher, it’s hard to say.  Not much is required of him beyond being stoic and shooting people…not necessarily in that order.

And for a movie with so little plot, there are so many plot holes.  Jigsaw is a mob boss but he has literally two guys in his mob.  He has to go scrounging up random street thugs in order for there to be enough cannon fodder for the movie’s final showdown.  And after Castle accidentally kills an undercover FBI agent he is so distraught that he gives up being The Punisher…for 15 seconds  And why does every building in the movie, regardless of how rundown, dilapidated and clearly abandoned it is, have a brand new, brightly lit sign declaring its name?

This is essentially a slasher flick where we’re supposed to root for the slasher.  (After all, is there really a difference between Michael Myers and Frank Castle other than their victims?)  The effects are more in-line with a slasher flick than they are with a traditional action movie.  It’s a unique take and, honestly, it might be the movie’s only positive attribute.  And that’s a pretty sad thing.

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being Death Wish and 1 being Death Wish 5: The Face Of Death, Punisher: War Zone gets a 2.

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<![CDATA[Cadilliac Records - Chess Records Gets The Bio Pic Treatment]]> 5264 Fri, 05 Dec 2008 08:00:00 -0700 Cadillac Records tells the story of the influential blues and rock label Chess Records.  Founded by Leonard Chess in 1947, he helped popularize blues and desegregate popular music.  Chess (played by Adrien Brody) is a somewhat shady character.  He’s not above a little payola in order to get a record played.  Nor is he averse to signing his artists to sketchy record deals.

Chess’ first discovery is Muddy Waters (played by Jeffrey Wright).  Waters leaves sharecropping in Mississippi in order to follow his passion for music.  He quickly meets up with soon-to-be legendary harmonica player Little Walter (Columbus Short).  And then the hits just keep on comin.’

Cadillac Records is a fun but seriously flawed film.  It falls into the same trap that so many music based biopics do and ends up becoming a collection of scenes rather than a cohesive story.  There are parts of the movie that feel as if they’ve already been parodied by last year’s Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story.  One of Walk Hard’s best gags was how Dewey would meet famous people and they’d always introduce themselves using their full names and some sort of identifier: “Hi, I’m Ringo Starr of The Beatles.”  There’s a scene where The Rolling Stones stop by the Chess Studios that is present for no other reason than to say (nay, scream), “ Hey look, The Rolling Stones liked these guys.”

The film is basically sequential anecdotes and, I would guess, many of them apocryphal.  At one point, Little Walter shoots an impersonator in the middle of the street in broad daylight and simply drives away.  The incident is never mentioned again.  The movie also hints at an affair between Etta James (Beyoncé Knowles) and Leonard Chess that apparently has no basis in fact.  Taken on its own, Cadillac Records would make one think that there were only four artists on Chess Records: Muddy Waters, Little Walter, Etta James and Howlin’ Wolf (Eamonn Walker).  I understand the need for truncation.  The movie already short shrifts everyone’s story in order to hit its hour and forty-five minute running time.  But to not even mention artists like Buddy Guy, John Lee Hooker or Bo Diddley feels somewhat hypocritical.  It seems disingenuous for a film whose central conceit is that the work of Waters, Walter, Wolf and James has been glossed over by pop culture.

Good performances abound in the film. Jeffery Wright gives a star turn as Muddy Waters.  And if Mos Def’s acting career ever tanks, he could make a nice living touring as a Chuck Berry impersonator.  His performance is so strong that it makes you wish they had spun him off into a Chuck Berry picture.  His protrayal of Berry is full of humor and charm that we rarely see from the actual Berry these days.  And from what little we do see of Berry’s story, it becomes fairly evident as to why those traits have faded over time.  Eamonn Walker is also fascinating as Howlin’ Wolf.  And, of course, there’s Beyonce as Etta James.  While some critics are raving, her performance isn't drastically different from her role in Dreamgirls.  And, like Dreamgirls, it seems like much her acting is centered on her singing.

Cadillac Records is an enjoyable but somewhat crudely assembled picture.  There are some fun moments and it goes without saying that the soundtrack is wonderful.  But, ultimately it feels as if an opportunity was wasted.  The actors were game but the screenplay lets them down with what feels less like an A-list movie and more like a reenactment of an episode of Behind The Music. 

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being Ray and 1 being Josie And The Pussycats, Cadillac Records gets a 6.

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<![CDATA[Holiday Gifts for a Twilight Fan]]> 5268 Thu, 04 Dec 2008 13:00:41 -0700
While Christmas shopping this season, many of you may find yourselves looking for a gift for a female between the ages of 12-60. Crazy, I know, but if you are, there is a high possibility that they are a ginormous fan of Twilight and vampires and such. If your favorite gal (or guy) falls into that category, what is a non-Twilight fan to buy for them? How do you know what qualifies as a great Twilight gift, or if the vampire-loving giftee would even like the gift in the first place? Chances are, they already have the books and the soundtrack, but that's not all that Twilight has to offer.

Here are a few Twilight-themed gift ideas, and just so you know that I wasn't pulling this out of thin air, I ran them by a few friends who would appreciate them. The following gifts have a Twilight fan's seal of approval.

  • This Cafepress user is "obsessed with Twilight!" (Her words, not mine.) Anyway, she has an assortment of Twilight-themed t-shirt designs in her collection, and I don't know an Edward fan who wouldn't love a semi-original shirt that proclaimed "Find Your Own Vampire, Edward Cullen is All Mine." To order one, click here.
  • Barnes and Noble is offering up these lovely Twilight-inspired bookends. According to fans, they are based on the chess pieces from Breaking Dawn, the fourth book in the series. If anything, they'll be a great showcase for their soon-to-be-five Twilight books.
  • For those with a greater sense of literary appreciation, the collector's edition of the first book, Twilight, is now available. And if price isn't a factor for you, a signed First Edition of Twilight is being auctioned off for over $4,000 dollars on eBay. Dang.
  • This mom from twilightmoms.com is selling Twilight jewelry. It's a subtle way for them to show your support for vampires all day long, without actually spelling it out on a t-shirt. Your giftee might enjoy this "Bite Me" bracelet, or even a pair of apple earrings.
  • Finally, if you want to give the gift of all gifts for your Twilight fan, buy them tickets to the Twilight Convention (aka, TwiCon 2009). At $255 per person, registration might seem a little bit steep, but your Twilight-lover will be able to see a screening of the movie, go to all of the other TwiCon activiteis, and even go to the Volturi Masque Ball. Warning: they have to be at least 18 to attend this one.
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<![CDATA[Australia - Hugh Jack-Men At Work]]> 5148 Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:00:00 -0700

Don’t let the title (or the commercials promising a chick flick of the highest order) fool you.  Australia is a good ol’ fashion western.  Sure, the movie is ostensibly set just before the outbreak of World War II but this movie could have just as easily starred John Wayne and Maureen O’Hara as it does Hugh Jackman and Nicole Kidman.  Kidman plays Lady Sarah Ashley, an English aristocrat who inherits Far Away Downs, an expansive cattle ranch in the Australian outback.  There is the obligatory culture clash as she attempts to bring her civilized ways to both the hyper-masculine world of cattle ranching and the ancient Aboriginal tribes that inhabit the land.  Jackman plays Dover, a charming rapscallion with a heart-of-gold.  He plays the role of a jaded loner but I don’t think a spoiler alert is needed to reveal that he can be counted on to do the right thing in a pinch.   

Lady Ashley quickly (and justifiably) runs off Fletcher (David Wenham), her head ranch hand, when she finds him morally lacking.  The rest of the hands leave with him.  She then convinces Dover to help her run the ranch and drive her herd to market.  Since she’s short on staff, she’s forced to join the drive herself as well as use the help of  Nullah (played by newcomer Brandon Walters), a half-white/half-Aborigine child that lives on the ranch.  (Apparently child labor was cute in the ‘30s.)  In order to secure a lucrative military contract, Lady Ashley needs to get her stock to market before King Carney (Bryan Brown), a competitor who has a virtual monopoly on the Australian cattle market.  Over the course of their drive, they form a sort of makeshift family as they all teach the others about their respective ways of life.   

Australia is full of…well, Australia.  Shot on location the movie is replete with large, sweeping, beautiful shots of the outback.  The movie allegedly cost $130 million and every penny of it is on the screen.  Australia is as much a character in this film as Jackman or Kidman are.  The country is so lovingly shot that it’s no wonder Tourism Australia, the official Australian board of tourism, is launching a $26 million ad campaign based around the film.  Australia, while not quite the caliber of a Howard Hawks or John Ford film, is certainly the type of movie they would have made.  It’s a broad, sweeping epic; a story of a nation and the people who tamed it; a travelogue of a time gone past.  It traffics in much of the same subject matter: a woman’s place in a “man’s world”, frontier racism, the modernization of rustic land.  Make no mistake, it’s not as good as Hawks or Ford at their best, but it comes close at times.  The extended cattle drive sequence is spectacular, albeit a bit too CGi-y in spots.  The movie’s broad strokes, stunning landscapes and good old fashioned storytelling draw you in.   

Unfortunately, the movie falters in its last hour.  (The movie is close to three hours.)  The story of the cattle drive consumes roughly the first two hours and it’s clearly the strongest portion of the film.  The movie transitions oddly into its last third.  As the cattle drive portion comes to close, the movie has the feel of finality.  Storylines are wrapped up, character arcs are resolved.  It feels like the credits will start rolling at any second.  But the movie continues on for almost another hour.  It evolves into a war movie as Australia is attacked by Japan.  Families are torn apart; our heroes are separated and forced to search for each other.  But it all feels so tacked-on.  The rousing race to market is followed by the slow realization that what felt like a thrilling conclusion was merely a false coda.   

Australia ends up a frustrating prospect in that it’s 2/3 of a great movie.  It feels as if the filmmakers were bound and determined to create an epic and knew that an hour and forty-five minute running time does not an epic make.  In this age of gratuitous sequel-itis, it’s difficult to criticize filmmaker for being overly ambitious but the movie would’ve been better served by a reduction in scale. 

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being Red River and 1 being Heaven’s Gate, Australia gets a 7.

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<![CDATA[Four Christmases - One Would Have Been Plenty]]> 5131 Wed, 26 Nov 2008 09:30:00 -0700 Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon team up in this season’s holiday offering Four Christmases.  They play Brad and Kate, a extremely happy, unmarried childless couple.  They are blissful in their selfishness (the film’s opinions, not necessarily mine); avoiding family functions at all costs so they can spend the holiday season vacationing together in exotic locales.  However, after spending three such Christmases together, they are unable to get out of San Francisco as all flights are unexpectedly canceled due to a plot device…um, I mean heavy fog.  Their families catch wind of this and they are immediately guilted into spending the holidays with their families.  (They each have divorced parents hence “Four Christmases”.)  Of course, each person is embarrassed by their families repeatedly.  And I do mean repeatedly.  There were times when the movie felt more like Four Groundhog Days than Four Christmases. 

Four Christmases is a harmless little trifle that can be described as cute if one is feeling gracious.  It, however, cannot be described as funny.  Vince Vaughn has given up on being a “serious actor” and has decided to make a career playing Vince Vaughn.  And I’m fine with that.  But his rambling, nervous patter that was so effective in Wedding Chasers falls flat here.  His comedic riffing can be hysterical in how he deflates a recipient’s ego with rapid-fire backhanded compliments disguised in a sea of verbiage.  But here it’s all riffing and no jokes, as if the writers had created the core of his speeches and expected him to bring the funny later.  Well, he did not.

The movie feels like repeated improv scenarios that consistently fall flat.  “Ok, give me a wacky hobby…cage fighter, got it…now give me weird situation…installing a satellite dish…great suggestions…here we go.”  “Ok now I need a personality trait and public place…cougar and church…awesome!”  Unfortunately, this troop is incapable of mining any of this for laughs; as is evidenced by the movie’s 82 minute running time.  It’s not even as if there are jokes that don’t work.  There just aren’t any jokes.  It’s as if they thought the zany situations were hysterical enough to carry the film.  The cast includes Robert Duvall, Jon Favreau, Mary Steenburgen, Dwight Yoakam, Tim McGraw, Jon Voight and Sissy Spacek.  All of their talents are completely, utterly wasted in this film.  The movie isn’t so much bad as it is forgettable.  I promise you; in five years you’ll stumble upon this film airing on TBS or USA and you’ll be surprised by its very existence.

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation and 1 being Christmas With The Kranks, Four Christmases gets a 5.

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<![CDATA[Milk - Sean Penn Stars As Assassinated Gay Activist]]> 4936 Wed, 26 Nov 2008 09:00:00 -0700 Milk stars Sean Penn as gay activist turned politician Harvey Milk.  Milk was the first openly gay elected official in the United States.  His activism was born out of necessity after opening a business in San Francisco.  Hard as it is to imagine, there was a time when San Francisco wasn’t the gay-friendly Mecca that it is today.  And Milk was an instrumental part of that change in attitude.  After meeting resistance from other local merchants, Milk decided that the best way to win over homophobic business owners was to show the economic clout of the gay community.  However, he illustrated their importance not just by boycotting the unfriendly stores but also by loyally frequenting the stores that welcomed their business.  Once business owners saw the economic potential of the community, they were much more accommodating.

Directed by Gus Van Sant, Milk is a masterfully crafted, but slow paced, bio-pic.  Van Sant makes wonderful usage of actual period footage and a framing device of Milk leaving a recorded will and testament (which is true) to set the scene.  The movie moves back and forth seamlessly between archival footage and that of the actors.  I’m sure much of this storytelling device was necessitated by the gentrification of San Francisco in general and The Castro (a predominantly gay neighborhood) specifically.  Regardless of the reason, the end result of the footage is to give the film a You Are There feel typically reserved for documentaries.  Unfortunately, the movie’s first half gets bogged down in Milk’s multiple failed attempts for public office.  Parts of the movie are fascinating: the gay community banding together to protect themselves from the police, watching the “established” gay leaders distancing themselves from Milk and his “uppity” crew, watching Milk figure out how to work the system.  But much of the first half is as interesting as watching any non-gay man run for a seat as a councilman, which is to say, not very interesting at all. 

The film picks-up considerably once Milk is elected to office.  Watching his rise to power is fascinating.  Equally fascinating is watching him become so adroit at the political machinations at which he was once so ham-handedly opposed.  The second half of the film is consumed largely by Milk’s fight against the Proposition 6 aka The Briggs Initiative, a ballot measure designed to prevent homosexuals from teaching in public schools.  Milk, frustrated with his compatriots’ apprehension at attacking the measure head-on, mounts his own campaign against the proposal.  Milk’s organizational skills were legendary and are featured prominently in the film.  He had the ability to muster a crowd of thousands on a moment’s notice.  Of course, what the film fails to mention is that he often did this with the help of another charismatic San Francisco community activist by the name of Jim Jones.

Penn’s performance at times borders on over acting but Milk was truly a larger-than-life figure.  For those unfamiliar with the actual Milk, Penn might appear over-the-top at times.  But the afore mentioned framing device of Milk recording his last will and testament serves the dual purpose of affording  Penn the opportunity to show a more subdued side and allows Milk to serve as the story’s narrator from beyond the grave. 

Milk’s eventual assassin, Dan White, is played by Josh Brolin.  The movie portrays White as a more of a tragic figure than an outright villain.  And while it’s remarkably gracious of the filmmakers to show the man’s complexities, his depiction as right-wing, Christian, possibly closeted homosexual isn’t entirely accurate.  White, a former cop turned firefighter turned elected official, was far from a right wing zealot.  In real life he supported numerous gay-friendly measures.  He voted to save the Pride Center (a sort of gay VFW Hall) and for a resolution honoring the 25th anniversary of a local lesbian couple.  He even initially voted for the Gay Rights Ordinance, Milk’s centerpiece legislation that would protect San Franciscans from losing their jobs based on their sexuality.  He only voted against the bill after Milk had (in White’s opinion) abandoned him on pet project of his own.  He even donated money to Milk’s campaign against the Briggs Initiative.  The problem with the inaccurate depiction isn’t so much that we might misunderstand a double-murder, but that by misrepresenting his apparent motivation the filmmakers are fostering a sort of implied guilt by association with unaffiliated parties.  While the religious right and the gay community are certainly not friends, there doesn’t appear to be an actual link between Dan White and that movement.  Connecting the two erroneously does a disservice to both groups.

However, Brolin’s performance is surprisingly moving given that he’s the heavy.  While I think the movie somewhat misrepresented White’s motivation, they didn’t do it at the expense of a well-drawn character.  White isn’t portrayed as the mustache-twirling, cartoony villain he could have so easily been turned into.  He’s painted not as vitriolic homophobe but as man that felt betrayed by Milk.  He’s less of demagogue and more of a wounded child.  His horrendous acts aren’t as much a political statement as they are a temper tantrum.  Brolin plays him as the kid excluded from the “cool clique.”  You can see he respects Milk and longs to be a part of their club.  Whether that longing is sexual or platonic is never really revealed (though the movie hints at that former).  While there is no evidence in real life as to White questioning his sexuality, his initial respect of and search for friendship with Milk is agreed upon by all parties.  Brolin drives home the tragic nature of the character.

Milk really captures the feel of its time.  Van Sant’s mixed use of actual period footage in combination with that of his own creates an immersive affect.  This combined with stellar performances from Sean Penn & Josh Brolin, make an intriguing but flawed snapshot of a captivating period in our not-too-distant past.

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being Philadelphia and 1 being I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry, Milk, gets a 7.

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