The Toast - 4.24.09 - Miss California vs. Perez and Beyonce Can't Sing

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You...Me...Toast...Now. Here's how the celebs made fools of themselves this week:

Tube Talk

The board feed audio from a Beyonce Today Show appearance is circling the Net and it seems B may not exactly have the angelic voice you might think she has...unless, of course, the angel you're speaking of is Lucifer. In that case, you're correct. Update: 'Twas a hoax, says TMZ.

The fallout continues with Perez Hilton and his little battle with Miss California. The two butted heads over gay marriage during the recent Miss USA pageant; now they've used their respective bullhorns to tell their sides.

Oprah pulled a 10th anniversary Columbine special just hours before it hit the air this week, claiming the show didn't focus enough on the shooting victims. Though we're not positive, it's safe to assume whoever produced that show is now fertilizer on Ms. Winfrey's lawn.

Star Gazing

A horse did the right thing this week and kicked Madonna off its back. The Material Girl took a spill while riding in New York and blames the paparazzi for the fall despite police reports indicating otherwise...perhaps she just sucks at equestrian.

Kim Kardashian took a trip to BlogLand to clarify that she's a size two. Everyone around her at the time burst into laughter and peed themselves, but the pop star insists, despite an US Weekly article, she only LOOKS like she's packing booty for weeks.

It didn't take Lindsay Lohan long to get over Sam Ronson; Page Six says the actress' hotel room has been a revolving door lately as man after man cozies up to her. She called me, but I was all like "you wish."

Reel World

Disney pulled out all the stops for their latest flick Earth...including enlisting James Earl Jones for the narration he does so well. The film aligns with BBC's award-winning Planet Earth series and, perhaps rightfully so, makes us feel guilty for how we've treated Mother Earth.

Jamie Foxx and Robert Downey Jr. pair up for The Soloist; a film best described as a cross between Mr. Holland's Opus and The Pursuit of Happyness. This one tells the true story of a homeless cello prodigy brought into the limelight by a determined newspaper columnist.

Fighting hits theaters to fill the violence void left by the aforementioned movies. Channing Tatum stars as a small-town boy who heads to the Big City only to be taken in by a con artist and introduced to the shady world of bare knuckle boxing.

That, and a pantload more awaits; so watch the video and pass it to a buddy.

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