Updated 408 Days ago

R.I.P. Circus Animal Cookies

by Roger Qbert in Health & Life
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The Dow just closed at its lowest amount in 5 years.  The average 401K is valued at slightly less than an Atari 2600.  And now the axe of recession has swung once more.  This time the victim is…Circus Animal Cookies.  Their parent company, Mother’s Cookies closed its doors on Monday with no advance notice.  That’s right, the economy is so bad that Mothers are going out of business.

Good God!  What has this world come to when a short, fat dude can’t Circus Animal Cookies.  These were the only animals you could eat without Peta kicking in your door.  How’s a guy supposed to get diabetes now?

Won’t someone think of the children?  How do you explain this to a 5-year old?

“Well Bobby, the housing bubble combined with Sub Prime mortgage abuse has caused money markets to break a buck.  And I don’t have to tell you that money markets fund commercial paper.  Once commercial paper stopped flowing, business-to-business transactions came to a screeching halt.”

See how easy that is?  Sheesh!  It’d be easier to tell a kid that Santa Claus has AIDS.  I think I’m just going to tell my kids they can’t have Circus Animal Cookies because we don’t love them anymore. 

Maybe the lazy kids should just make their own cookies.

RIP Circus Animal Cookies.  You will be missed.

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