Fake Mayor Slay: Total Recall - You Can't Handle the Truth

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Hope you are enjoying the beginning of your week St. Louis. Ever since I pushed through the "Gorgeous Weather 2008" bill, August has been mild and sunny.

Okay, I didn't really pass a bill to make the weather nice. But even if I did, someone would probably be mad about it.

Like the jokers who are trying to put together a recall petition to get me pulled from office. What's that? Are you unhappy about something? I'm sorry, I'm having trouble hearing you over the dull roar of HOW AWESOME I AM!! Tell you what, I'll just step aside and acquiesce to the other person running for Mayor next spring. What? NO ONE is running against me? Do you know why?

Because I am a By-God Force of Nature! I got 19,500 votes in the last election, that's like 18% of the population of St. Louis. That's not just a victory, that's a mandate from the people for me to stay in City Hall and kick tail!

To borrow from noted scholar Col. Nathan Jessup: You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties you want me in that Hall, you need me in that Hall. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said "thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a pen and run for office. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to!

But seriously, be proud that you almost got one-third of the signatures you need to even get the recall process started. Don't think that makes you one-third of a man. Think of it as "the glass is half full." Except, it is actually two-thirds empty. Nice job!